After last night's random and fascinating adventure, I went to sleep feeling satisfied with every single turn of events. It was obvious to me that by not getting what I wanted, I had gotten everything I needed...
As I was getting in bed, I re-read some of the things I wrote throughout the evening. I promised myself to be more consistent and decided to make the compromise of writing this blog a little (or a lot) every day, no matter what. So I start my day today doing exactly what I told myself to do.
Regarding last night, there is not much point for me to reproduce the events of the evening; the moments have passed and can not be retold as excitingly as they were while occurring. I could summarize some by saying that each time a moment ended (even when I tried several times to prolong it) a new moment arose by running into people or unexpectedly dropping by at my friend's house, who wasn't even at home. Retelling the exact story is not appealing to me at this point in time, it will only be my "mental masturbation" of remembering a fun evening, full of casual and intense encounters. But I will share with you some of the writing I did while IN the moment.
The first writing was at "Nirvana" when Eric and Mark decided I had ceased to exist -that was the joke. My poem is in Spanish and I will translate it later on. For now, these are the random bits and pieces of their conversation... I can never cease to exist if I chose to...
As I was getting in bed, I re-read some of the things I wrote throughout the evening. I promised myself to be more consistent and decided to make the compromise of writing this blog a little (or a lot) every day, no matter what. So I start my day today doing exactly what I told myself to do.
Regarding last night, there is not much point for me to reproduce the events of the evening; the moments have passed and can not be retold as excitingly as they were while occurring. I could summarize some by saying that each time a moment ended (even when I tried several times to prolong it) a new moment arose by running into people or unexpectedly dropping by at my friend's house, who wasn't even at home. Retelling the exact story is not appealing to me at this point in time, it will only be my "mental masturbation" of remembering a fun evening, full of casual and intense encounters. But I will share with you some of the writing I did while IN the moment.
The first writing was at "Nirvana" when Eric and Mark decided I had ceased to exist -that was the joke. My poem is in Spanish and I will translate it later on. For now, these are the random bits and pieces of their conversation... I can never cease to exist if I chose to...
#1
Let it unravel,
he says.
A small world is not meant to be,
small world
don't put it together.
Music,
Fucking AWESOME!
For sure,
he said after his 4th beer.
But that for me is ideal.
The reality is
they are fucked...
Intense and blah blah.
they are fucked
For sure...
And I Love them both.
#2
Run, run, run and hide.
Stand still,
jump.
Let the connections find your shinning,
let them fly.
Run, run, run and hide.
Love, cry, connect and break me up.
Fly, crawl, walk and get me high...
#3
A song request (Robbie at piano)
Moments are gone
and moments always come back.
Little droplets of windows
go down the drain.
My eyes,
full of rain
are washing off my tears.
Storms,
Oh storms,
How I fear you!
Come back my child,
I will give you a piece of my soul
for you to find solace.
Suns, millions of them,
I have them all
inside my self.
A tiny box of memories
in which I sometimes hide.
A tiny box full of memoirs,
why do I save them?
Sometimes the rain
is not strong enough
to wash away the tears.
But the suns inside and all around,
are shinning through.
Oh my child,
I have forgiven you.
Oh my child,
would you forgive me?
Every single time
I collapsed,
drowned in illusion,
the one I now embrace.
The one reality I choose to live,
Illusion.
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