April 16, 2009

Waking life...


And now I'm awake...
After trying hard to get you to tell me who I am.
After obsessing over my feelings.
After letting my drunkenness speak for me,
in times where desperation was my only companion.
Now I'm finally awake.
No more lies to myself,
no more illusions,
suppositions,
preconceptions
and confusions.

I'm awake from a long dream.
I can't remember the story,
just how it felt...
deep and long;
mischievous;
a collection of assumptions
that never led me to a better place.
Now I'm done with this fantasy.
I thank you for the good times,
for the moments we shared;
which were always quite pure.

I'm awake,
my eyes are fully opened.
What did I dream of?
I dreamt that I could steal your heart,
that I could dwell in your incomprehensible passionate being.
I dreamt that you would give me all the answers.
I saw myself,
reflected in you...

But now,
fully awake,
I understand
that your heart will never tell me
how it feels to be inside mine.
I understand
that I've expected to much from you.
I was waiting for you to explain who I am.
I've asked from you,
to define what doesn't have a name.
I'm sorry for being selfish.
Forgive it.
Forget me.
I will be the one to remember us...

2 comments:

  1. Que penosos dolores, pueden desgarrar el alma y permitir transformar en bellas palomas al aire cuando el alma estalla
    Irene Polosecki

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